Did you know that being happy all the time can affect your marriage in so many ways? Happiness in marriage is not just about your spouse; it begins with you. The truth is that when you are happy, it will reflect in your mood, and your mood creates multiple effects, deepening your bond as a couple.
That also means sadness or negative vibes can destroy even the strongest relationships. This being said, what is stopping you from prioritizing happiness in your marriage? Let’s look at how happiness in marriage affects the marriage, so you can follow the steps to improve yours. If you are ready for this, let’s dive in.
Happiness in marriage is something you can share with your partner, Of course, it is contagious. When you stay around a depressed person, you will feel depressed too, the same as when you stay around a happy person.
In this article, you will learn how your happiness affects your marriage, and the steps to build a more happy relationship by improving your happiness too.
Stage 1
Getting to know who you are is one way you can make yourself happy. Many people believe they know who they are, but it may amaze you to know that you do not know much about yourself.
Do you know your feelings about certain things? Have you asked yourself about how you feel about the things that make you happy or bother you?
Knowing who you are and the things that appeal to others gives you a clue about those things that attract people to you.
Dear, there is no way you can set goals, and make your marriage or relationship happy if you are not aware of who you are and what you want in life.
When you can identify who you are, it will
Try to have a reflection of yourself. Your past, your present, and your beliefs; all are important too when you want to have a good future.
One important quality of a man is the character. Without character, you may not have success in life. The number one component of man’s character is the ability, to be honest with you.
You may succeed when you tell lies to others to gain wealth or power, but the worst of it all is when you lie to yourself. Poor decisions, poor judgments, and negative self-mastery are the results of self-dishonesty and until you are honest with yourself, you may not have success in anything you do.
Being honest with yourself will make you see things the exact way they are without pretense. Honesty is very vital when making effective changes and when you are trying to identify who you are and the things you want.
Many people through self-deception refuse to tackle the issues of their “past activities”, and circumstances and this prevents them from moving forward.
Remember every lie, every deception, and every act of dishonesty; sum up to create the monster that will destroy your life and character.
Almost everyone desires an honest relationship. When there is openness and honesty, compatibility is engendered in a relationship.
If you and your partner become open and honest to yourselves about your past and present actions as well as your plans for the future, it will help you to make quality decisions that take you to a great level of personal and professional success.
Understand what you want from your spouse. A lot of books have been written about expectations but not want, but in being honest with yourself, you must differentiate the two. Be clear about the things you want from your spouse.
Stop for a while and think about those things you think you want your spouse to do, have, or be that will engender your happiness. But, you must know that your happiness is not in anyone’s hands but you.
When you are sure of the things that make you happy and have learned how to be honest with yourself, then the next thing is to
Stage 3
Setting boundaries is necessary when you want to be emotionally and physically healthy.
What do I mean by setting boundaries:-
This is the space or limit between the other person and you, the very place you start and where the other ends.
From my experiences, I realized that the root of our struggles is fear. Our relationships start dying when we work with fear instead of love. Sometimes we cannot see those fears that have been “driving our choices”, stopping us from doing the best for ourselves thereby destroying our relationships.
However, when you understand how to set boundaries for yourself, it will help you strengthen your capacity to fall in love with yourself and let loose the “ego’s fear perception”.
When you create healthy boundaries for yourself it helps you protect your self-esteem, and self-respect and to enjoy your relationship.
It doesn’t matter if you are just hooking up, or have been in courtships, you cannot do without setting boundaries. To maintain a happy marriage or relationship, every couple must understand each other’s wants, fears, goals, and limits.
It is good you discuss your boundaries with your spouse because it will make sure that each other’s needs are properly taken care of.
This also comprises how open you are about yourself and how comfortable you are when it comes to your emotions.
Put it down on a piece of paper:-
The first step thing to do is to identify the boundaries you want to set for yourself or your relationship and write them on a notepad. That will help you to have clarity about the things you want and do not want and get ready to work with them to achieve your goals.
When preparing to communicate your boundaries with someone, you must allow yourself to tell them everything without feeling self-doubt.
At times your greatest adversity may be your fear about how other people will react to it rather than how they can genuinely respond. Understand that it is your right to establish your points the way ought to be seen with dignity.
When you have defined your boundaries, and you are sure of your rights to maintain them, then you are ready to share them with other people. Try to be specific and straight to the point.
After setting the boundaries, the next thing is to decide on the type of spouse you want to be.
When you are done setting your boundaries, the next thing is to choose.
If you are interested in making your relationship or marriage strong, then you must make up your mind to be the best you can be to your partner.
Though there is no specific formula for being a wonderful spouse, there are some steps you may take to make your marriage better than it is right now. I have written some of them down for you.
Be a good listener:
Being a good listener is one of the qualities of a good life partner. Let your mind be clear from any distraction while your partner is communicating with you, so you will be able to respond well to what he/ she is saying and not what you have in mind to say.
Always give a listening ear to whatever your spouse has to say with respect and if you think you do not agree, let your spouse know politely. If you show politeness when you are listening to your spouse, it will give your wife the courage to tell you all about his/her interests, concerns, and issues.
Most times we think we know what our partner will say next and we interrupt. We believed we were helpful by speeding up the discussion, but it shows your poor skills as a listener. Give him/her a chance to finish talking before interjecting or answering.
When your partner is telling you about their problems or concerns, you may want to respond with your own story, but that is not what your partner needs at that time; all she wants from you is sympathy and not all about you.
To be the best partner, you must focus on hearing your partner, and break up your multitasking habits.
Describe to yourself what you know about romance.
True romance is doing special and unexpected things for someone you love and care for unexpectedly even when there is no need to do that.
Getting romance back into your marriage is not rocket science; with little effort, you can excite your use.
Quick tips to help you have happiness in marriage
Write down those things your spouse loves so much:-
Write down the things he/she loves and get them for him or her, then place them wherever you know he/she can see them by surprise. It may be at the corner of her bed, in his/her cupboard, or in any good position.
Send sweet text mass messages to your spouse:
When you and your spouse are far from each other, try sending quality love text messages to him/her.
When you wake up in the morning, tell him/her how nice it feels to wake up by his side. Then send a mass message to your spouse about how you cannot wait to be by his/her side while you are not close at that moment.
Give up a day just to stay in your bed, just you and your spouse together. Have everything ready (food, drinks, and everything you may need) beside your bed, hug, kiss, cuddle, and enjoy sex together.
Talk about the first day you met each other and do everything that will keep love going.
There are so many ways you can do that. You can ask your spouse not to worry about the house chores and you take it up. Just find a way to do a little pampering.
Stage 5
What are the things happy couples do together:
No marriage is born to be happier than the other. There are hitches in every marriage. The happily married couples go the extra mile while dealing with their conflicts to stay happy.
The best thing you can do is to understand those things that make them different from unhappy families and inculcate them in your marriage.
They work on their relationship:-
Marriage needs care and nurturing all the time. Just the same way your garden will develop weeds when you neglect it, so it is a marriage when you refuse to take care of it too.
Everything in life needs support to grow. The happy couples are bent on making their marriage strong instead of destroying it. They make commitments that move them to get to where they want to be.
Nothing can bring marriage happiness than the share of quality time by couples. Create a point of being together without your kids or pets.
Just make it a y and your spouse time together. This will help to form a bond that will see you through a lifetime especially when the storms of life come so many things that will make the time quality and memorable.
Respecting your spouse will surely generate the same for you also. Make it a point of duty to tell your spouse how much he/she means to you.
That will enrich your marriage. When you express your love to your partner, pause for a moment and mean what you say. Never be afraid to show how you feel for your partner.
Happiness In marriage is a pivot that will pull every other thing in life and make it work well for you and your spouse. Get busy now and make yourself happy it will help to attract marriage happiness to anyone who comes or stays around you. It is up to you to start from this point where I stopped.
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